To celebrate the opening of the fourth Pirates movies — Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides — here is my original review of the first movie, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. My review of the new movie will be posted Friday morning.
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With Johnny Depp as the engagingly goofy pirate lead it couldn’t possibly be bad.
Depp plays a salty sea dog with gold teeth and a drunk swagger in Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, Disney’s second film based on attractions at its theme parks. The first was the worthless Country Bears; the third will be the Eddie Murphy vehicle The Haunted Mansion. I can't wait until they do a movie-version of that bitchin' Monorail.
The press kit doesn’t refer to the movie as an interpretation of the Disneyland ride of the same name, a slow-moving boat ride among Cajun and Creole pirates as they loot and plunder the Big Easy; it’s an “homage,” the material says. Well, whatever it is, it weaves a swashbuckling adventure across the high seas, where bald men with earrings, naked lady tattoos and bad teeth can set sail in a yarn as wild as they get. And when someone gets in their way: Ar, they send’em down to Davey Jones’ locker in a rain of cannonball fire, or they make’em walk da plank. And thar be a sailor’s death, ye matie.
Depp plays Captain Jack Sparrow, an unlucky pirate recruited by Will Turner (Orlando Bloom), the eager young blacksmith who must rescue his true love from cursed, more-evil pirates. Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush), the meanest pirate since One-Eyed Willie or Blackbeard, kidnaps Will’s young lass after she’s discovered with a missing piece of Aztec gold.
Barbossa and his vile crew on the Black Pearl, a mythical ship with coal-colored sails and a gray mist that follows behind it, unleashed a Spaniard curse when they stole the gold coins years before. Under the moonlight, their skin rots away leaving walking skeletons unable to feel, taste or smell. The only way they can break the curse is to return all the pieces of gold and sacrifice an innocent with the last coin.
The adventures in Pirates are numerous and far-reaching — sword battles in blacksmith shops, rope-swinging trickery on cluttered docks and crowded harbors, gun fights, cannon battles and full-on wars in which British soldiers grapple with pirate skeletons. This is the kind of fodder summer movies were made to exploit.
Depp really makes this flick enjoyable, especially since he’s been mistaken as a pirate in real life. A rogue on his own merit, Depp is introduced here as a befuddled, yet rebellious, pirate who can’t seem to find his buccaneer groove. Jack’s Sparrow’s introduction into Black Pearl is unforgettable and it utilizes Depp’s natural comedic touch. Sparrow sails into port on a sinking boat, unfazed by his ship’s buoyancy.
Pirates of the Caribbean, directed by the same guy that did the creepy horror The Ring (Gore Verbinski), is Disney’s first PG-13 movie ever, and it should be. It’s a little too violent for the little ones, especially once the skeletons start attacking folks with meat hooks and cleavers.
Don’t get the wrong idea though, this is a Disney dazzler, one tough sea cracker (on land: cookie) that never takes itself too serious. And unlike too many movies out now, there’s plenty to see. At no time during this two-hour adventure is it not delivering on all cylinders. Ahoy, this be fun.
